A year ago I went through a month long yoga teacher training program. It was an intense program with about 70 students. Toward the end of the month we were getting to know each other fairly well and the teachers put us through a process that was pretty amazing. I thought of it today and want to share the process and some of the insights.
I have been struggling lately with my mood. It has been going up and down kind a like my blood sugars. As usual, the persistent questions of why and what keep entering my mind. Why are we here? Why do I have to deal with this disease? Why do I feel so bad? What is my purpose? What should I do?
The Soul Garden process went like this. We all partnered up. One partner represented the soul and one was the heart. we all formed a big circle… To begin, the hearts (about 35 of us) went in the middle of the circle and got into a yoga pose or any pose and held it. After a few moments the souls were instructed to go into the middle and find a way to physically support the hearts’ poses. We stayed in this formation for a minute or so. Then, while the souls maintained their pose…the hearts were instructed to move out of the circle and then go back in to support the souls’ poses. We alternated this several times.
What we experienced was what it felt like to be supported, what it felt like to support. what it felt like to be unsupported, what it felt like to stretch to support and many other things. It was very emotional for many people. I was reminded at the time how fortunate I have been to have people around me who have supported me. My father, my mother, my brother, my sisters, friends and others. I was also reminded of how much capacity I have to support.
As a Type 1 diabetic there are certain things I have not been able to do. On a more subtle level, having diabetes has forced a defenition of who I am in a certain way. I know some of you may not understand this. I imagine it would be hard to understand if you have not experienced a major chronic illness. I am unable to be or do some things that I could otherwise be or do. On the flip side, it means I can be or do things that I otherwise could not do.
I am grateful and appreciative of all those who have supported me. I am constantly searching for ways to support you and others so that I can mantain and grow the Soul Garden.